


Yugen / Wasuremono

by gillichan_1098



Category: Monsta X (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Shine Forever (Music Video), Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Character Death, Heavy Angst, Hyungwon is a literal Saint, M/M, Minor Lee Minhyuk/Son Hyunwoo | Shownu, Minor Lee Minhyuk/Yoo Kihyun, References to Cutting, References to Depression, X Clan / Shine Forever Era Fic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-07-06
Updated: 2018-07-06
Packaged: 2019-06-06 02:32:05
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 9,186
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15184802
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/gillichan_1098/pseuds/gillichan_1098
Summary: A day came when the seven boys, who know nothing of each other, came together and fell apart again because disaster struck them, leaving them as six. The final six though find their lives fall apart without the others involved in it, as they realize this, they start the process of healing and slowly, but surely come back together at the end. A plan that was fool-proof to bring them all back together comes from the member that isn't with them anymore. He has finally been able to bring them back together and made them reunite as the group they were. He even shows them the most important things in their lives, the friendship, and kinship of they all share, no matter how it's shared.A clan was formed, a clan fell, a clan revived... No matter the flaws and accidents involved, a family is a family, a leader is a leader, and the lost will be found.Protecting what they live for, living how they do, doing what they please, pleasing those around them. It's a cycle and they live in it.AKA The story of seven boys, who were so young and wild, become older, and inspirited, began the story they were meant for, in some cases death occurs. The young become old and realize that they learned something, making them wiser.





	Yugen / Wasuremono

**Author's Note:**

> Song list :  
> I will carry you -Selah  
> Spring Day - BTS  
> Bring You Back - Gold Brothers feat. LIIV  
> Lonely –Sistar ( English cover by Emily Dimes and Piano Cover )  
> Dancing in the Sky - Danny and Lizzi 
> 
> Words from the boys :
> 
> “ Sad but beautiful youth “  
> “ We missed out on each other, to search for the X Clan... “  
> “ I keep blaming myself for everything... But I believe he's still alive... At least that's what I keep telling myself “  
> “ Starting a never-ending disagreement “  
> “ They told me to stop hallucinating, but I believe... you're still with us...”  
> “ At the last of the disagreement, we stopped on a lonely road... “  
> “ I'm leaving “  
> “ We're leaving “  
> “ They must have forgotten you. They left you alone... But I will never forget “
> 
> “ We, betting on everything we have, solemnly swear, that we will abide by everything said in this oath. 1 Find what we have lost, 1 Fill up our empty heart, 1 Find the right path and move on forwards, 1 We will not leave anyone behind. We will become one and protect the X Clan. “  
> “ There ain't no way to forget you “  
> “ Let's revive the clan “  
> “ For the X Clan “  
> “ For the seven of us “  
> “ We met once again “  
> “ Even though we gambled everything away... We still have to guard the X Clan “

All seven boys attending a school of their choice. Most of them the same school. None of them, in the beginning, had ever met another before the day they ran into each other accidentally. One by one they became a close-knit group, enjoying all the fun the seven could have. Though it was not all fun and games. Considering they were quite an odd group.

Hyunwoo was the first to met someone, he was in the on-campus cafe, getting a cup of coffee to relieve the stress his instructor had caused, and met Kihyun, who had the same idea, got a cup of something hot. The two bumped into each other as both of their names had been called to get the drinks. Hyunwoo had knocked Kihyun over as he was about to reach for his coffee, and he slipped and fell. Hyunwoo felt guilty so he helped him up and they ended up sitting with each other and chatting the evening away. They ended up setting up another meeting between the two, swapping numbers in the process. Along the way the had started dating, being the parents of the friend group.

After all the events of that, Kihyun was next to meet someone, he went by Shin Hoseok, and he was an ulzzang, someone who is very handsome and they seem to fit an aesthetic of sorts. Kihyun had met him while he was walking back to his little apartment building when he saw Hoseok with his phone out taking a picture. He waved it off and went walking when Hoseok actually asked him to take a picture with him. To which Kihyun couldn't deny, so they did, and swapped numbers, laughing about the picture, as Hoseok showed, walking into the building with him, Kihyun realized the two lived in the same building. Funny stories.

Kihyun had introduced Hoseok and Hyunwoo, as the two were the only people he had been around since his high school days. The one day they all decide to go out and meet up, they run quite literally and completely into Lee Jooheon, who is trying to freestyle and failing miserably. Hyunwoo laughs as he helps him back up, and Jooheon dubs him Appa Hyunwoo, as he acts father like and joins the group on their little adventure to an arcade in the downtown part of the city. Jooheon and Hoseok end up playing billiards while Kihyun and Hyunwoo watch. The fours seem to get closer, all swapping numbers the four keeping in touch.

Jooheon in the midst of going to meet an old friend sees someone getting picked on, he looks to be a high school kid. So he walks on over and thumps the kid who is picking on the other, smaller boy. The older looking kid on the ground looks at Jooheon and takes a running start, screaming something about how the other knew a college kid and that he dead next time he sees him, which wouldn't happen again, after all, the kid too afraid Lim Changkyun would call his hyung to come to his rescue. As he found out, Jooheon had saved the cute Changkyun, who punched him for saying he was cute. He walked the kid to school and then went to meet his friend texting Hyunwoo about the incident. He actually waited for the kid to leave school so he could drag him to a cafe to meet Hyunwoo and the other two, which ended with them becoming close.

Hoseok is the one to meet one of the last members, and that entails he got the guys name and hangs with him for a night, helping him with a project he had, it was over the effect filters had over pictures and when and why to use them. His name was Chae Hyungwon, and he seemed to be a kind sweet kid, quiet but he was cute nonetheless. The two got along and that meant the world to both, Hyungwon had met someone to help him by modeling, and Hoseok had someone to take his picture and actually make him a much better ulzzang. They had stayed in touch, meeting the rest of the group Hoseok hangs out with on his off days, still playing billiards and learning eight-ball pool. The two got along and eventually, Hyungwon started to like Kihyun and Hyunwoo.

Hyungwon met the last member. He was in one the many classes Hyungwon took, he was the only person in the room to actually color their hair beside Hoseok or Kihyun, who both were in the class with him along the way as he had found out. Lee Minhyuk was asked by their professor to answer a question, to which he can't possibly do, seeing as he hadn't studied for the work, he had to improvise the answer as he was a really smooth talker with his work. Hyungwon hears him and starts laughing as he went on and on. He, in the end, talks to him and hanging a blast, also he was introduced to the other five men.

They all had become friends with each other. All learning a good lesson on how to share and not be scared of others. The formed a gang-like group. They weren’t really the type to do horrible things, but you can’t be sure. They all have studied hard, worked hard no matter what type of work, and even when their free, party to relax from all the stress of school. Changkyun also had his entrance exams for colleges to study for, and also had to make sure he could get to the college he wanted into. But that didn't mean they couldn't be around each other, they did hang around each other, inseparable at times. A few things lead them to be delinquents in the eyes of others, they had all been in trouble with the police a time or two. Kihyun though was treated terribly in his life. Hyunwoo as well. Hoseok, Changkyun, and Minhyuk all had been quiet, Hoseok was sensitive and hide away, using social media as an escape. Hyungwon was just a silent man with a camera. Changkyun had games, which he was quite fond of. Jooheon though had a few other friends, but he thought the others were closer to him than his other friends.

As it seems they were almost inseparable, a group that was loud, wild, and crazy together. All of them were fairly fun and had their charms. They decided one day they would start a group, one they called the X Clan, it was a group to keep them together, and make sure they never fell apart from each other in case they did go their separate ways. They would have to see each other in the Oath. The Oath was something they all did, as the way to keep them in the group and together. Hyunwoo had said these words in the utmost serious tone, and that led them to be the X Clan, “ We, betting on everything we have, solemnly swear, that we will abide by everything said in this oath. 1 Find what we have lost, 1 Fill up our empty heart, 1 Find the right path and move on forwards, 1 We will not leave anyone behind. We will become one and protect the X Clan. “

In a weird way, though they did fall apart, it was a hard thing to see, but I will tell you what happened that day, so you can see what caused the breaking of the X Clan. How they destroyed their own Oaths to the X Clan.

Story Starts :  
Two of the group's members were driving to meet up with the rest just as it was getting dark. Kihyun and Minhyuk were the two who were driving, leaving Hyunwoo, Hoseok, Hyungwon, Jooheon, and Changkyun waiting on them. They had to all meet at the building they all had built and fixed up to hold these kinds of meetings. They were all doing something to take up the time they had to wait. Whether it be a game of pool or video games, they were all doing something.

It wasn't common that Minhyuk drove, he had just gotten his license and wanted to practice, it was common for him to drive on with his bike or skateboard, but not in a car. Hyunwoo, the leader of the group and father-like figure he was, always drove and made sure everyone was safe. Hoseok could as well drive and pick them up if need be seeing as he was always that kind.

As it seems though, Minhyuk had rarely practiced night driving or driving with the headlights on, and he was very skittish to the bright lights in his eyes. He couldn't keep his eyes from being blinded. He struggled to drive the car, and Kihyun noticed this. He was trying to calm Minhyuk down as he started panicking.

As all that occurred, Hyunwoo was trying to call the two boys, seeing as it shouldn't have taken that long, especially when driving from what he knew. He was worried about the two as they were always there to cook, and they were all starving.

In the car, Minhyuk had started to hyperventilate getting terrified, and Kihyun was trying hard to calm him down and pull over slowly, so he could drive the rest of the way. But what ended up happening was they wrecked. He started speeding and lost control, skidding off the other side of the road, all that was heard was his screaming. He couldn't stop. His heart was racing, he couldn't Kihyun's voice anymore. It was no longer there to put him at ease, all he saw though was bright lights getting dimmer as he crossed off the road into a ditch, the car rolling off the other side of the road, Minhyuk's voice was getting louder and louder, and what happened next shocked everyone.

Kihyun's voice was no longer there, he had stopped trying to calm him down and started to reach for his phone to call Hyunwoo, and as he did so, he saw it started ringing. He attempted to answer but the rolling of the car down the ditch threw his phone from his hand, as he answered it and turned the speaker on, all that could be was, “ Kihyun! Kihyun! What's taking so long? Did something happen? Do I need to call an ambulance or something? Kihyun! Minhyuk! “

There was no sound, except for the loud scream Minhyuk let out before he fell unconscious. Kihyun had banged his head and was bleeding from a cut on it, Hyunwoo ends up not getting through and Kihyun's phone dies, leaving Hyunwoo's line dead and there was nothing he could do. He called the police to look for them and all he was told was, “ We'll try to locate your friends. “

Within that time, Minhyuk awoke to a still fading sun, barely after the car accident. He rushes to Kihyun's side of the car and starts to drag him out, he starts to dial for the police on his phone and start to cry as he spoke to the operator, “ I need help, my friend and I were in accident, on the highway just outside of the southern part of Seoul, I need an ambulance and quick, my friend has a cut and... he's unconscious. Please... hurry, “ He says it breathlessly and collapses after the call. He lays down beside Kihyun and holds his hand feeling the cold, and not realizing anything about it.

The operator had dispatched the call, and the police came as quickly as possible to the scene, finding Kihyun in an almost gone state and Minhyuk breathing steady, and the EMS driver taking the chance to start CPR on Kihyun. They load Minhyuk into a police car to get him attention immediately, he is attended to while they load Kihyun with the driver over him doing chest compression.

The other five boys being notified that the two were in an accident and that both were sent to the hospital. One in the ambulance and the other driven. That was all they knew, besides which hospital.

Minhyuk was getting stitches, and Kihyun was rushed to the OR for an emergency surgery. All Minhyuk knew was apparently Kihyun wasn't breathing when the first response team arrived, and that scared him. He should have listened to Kihyun when he had. If only though.

Hyunwoo and the others appear as Minhyuk is finished getting his stitches and the maknaes of the group rush to his side and check on him as he tells the police what had happened and explains what had caused the accident. He was told his parents were called and that they were on their way to the hospital, to which he sighed out.

A nurse came by and told Minhyuk the news on his friends status, “ If you boys can give me a moment to speak with Mr. Lee, I'll tell you as well. Mr. Lee follow me please, “ She says, leading him to a room with windows around it, on to the outer part of the hospital, and the other three showing empty rooms around them and the hallway to leave.

“ Mr. Lee, you are about to hear news that isn't very good, “ She says, pausing to let him get himself together, “ Yoo Kihyun has passed away, his heart couldn't be started back as it failed on them during his surgery, his body was also worse off than they thought, “ She calmly states, her face showing sympathy and her voice was toned with sadness.

“ He did have final words, Mr. Lee, for you. He said he wanted you and Hyunwoo to know he loved you both a lot, and he would no matter the outcome, “ She says, her head bowed. She leaves quickly and goes to the get the others.

Minhyuk sits, as he nods slowly, his head stops and drops suddenly as he starts to cry as the others are escorted into the room across from him. He cries out loudly as the others look at him through the window. He turns away, curling into himself, and his heart hurt. He had killed his friend and he couldn't even help him. He kept his head down as he cried, Minhyuk should have checked to see if Kihyun was at least breathing.

The nurse walked to the other five, “ If you boys will follow me, “ She says, ushering them into a room beside the one Minhyuk was in.

All the others could tell he was upset when they looked at him, but they didn't understand what had upset him. Until, “ Now, which one of you in Hyunwoo? “ She asks.

Hyunwoo quickly shots his hand up and looks at her, she nods and continues, “ Yoo Kihyun has not made it through the emergency surgery he was rushed into. His heart gave on him when they started to work on his lungs, I'm sorry boys, “ She says quietly, she nods and leaves them.

Hyunwoo looks into the room with Minhyuk and notices that he’s crying out loud and praying. Hoseok looks to Hyunwoo, and then to Minhyuk, and then to the others. They all seemed upset with what was going on. Jooheon had started bawling his eyes out. Changkyun sat silently with tears welled in his eyes, Hyungwon was devastated and had to cling to Hoseok to calm down.

Minhyuk looked up for one second and saw the devastated look on everyone's face, even then he knew Hyunwoo had to hate him at this point. He killed the love of his friend's life pretty much. He had ultimately made everything around himself come crashing down.

Hyunwoo though stood and walked out, walking into the room Minhyuk was in and asked, “ What happened Minhyuk? “

All that left Minhyuk was a sad sob as curled in on himself. He couldn't think of anything to say. It hurt him to even think at the moment. He clutched at his legs held up to his chest as he tried to avoid talking to Hyunwoo.

Hyunwoo looked at him and sighed, he sat down beside him, throwing an arm around him, “ Don't blame yourself, please. Kihyun wouldn't have wanted that. He cared a lot about you. You were his brother. He may not have been your blood, but he was a brother to you. He couldn't hate someone who he cared for and you know that, don't you? “ He says, his voice calm, but touched a bit with sadness.

Minhyuk nodded and looked up at him, “ I got scared, all the lights were blinding me, Hyunwoo. I got so scared. Kihyun tried really hard to calm me down, but I was screaming so loud I couldn't hear him, it is my fault, “ He says, his head started to spin. He put his head down again, but in his hands this time and starts to crying, he had caused so much trouble.

Hyunwoo immediately hugged him and stopped him from any more tears, “ It is not your fault, I'm sure Kihyun would forgive you, “ He says, keeping his head down as he spoke. He could feel tears in his eyes, but he continues to stay calm and collected.

All the others in the room across watched as Hyunwoo comforted the other, trying to make him feel less guilty. Minhyuk didn't need the stress he was already under a lot as is with college and all the other things in his life.

The nurse came back with a box of things, she handed it to Hyunwoo and leaves again, the two look at each other, and Hyunwoo starts to look in the box, he sees his phone with Hyunwoo and himself as the lock screen background, his wallet, his keys, his rings, his earrings, and his necklace, even a little band bracelet he wore every day. He looks at all the things and starts to feel his heartbreak slowly. He opens his wallet and sees his ID, his debit card, he sees the photos he kept in the wallet. He sees a group photo, or the family picture if you will, and finally the professionally taken pictures of them as a couple, it hurt him so much to see the smile on his face. He looks at the rings, seeing the ring he wore all the time on his ring finger in the box, and also his earrings, gifts from Hyunwoo on one of their anniversaries.

He looks at Minhyuk and smiles sadly, “ I told you, he loves you a lot, just look, “ He says quietly, showing Minhyuk a photo of the two of them. He didn't stumble over his words, he just felt alone. It was a rush of chills down his spine when he saw the things he had given Kihyun, knowing he wouldn't get the chance to wear them again ever.

All the other boys watch, they all see that Hyunwoo is on the verge of tears, but they hadn't yet seen them falling.

Then it just snapped, he became a torn up mess, causing him lean his head forward and cry with his head down, and Minhyuk clinging to him as the time goes by. All the other boys watch, crying themselves, not being able to imagine losing the person they love and claimed to be their soul mate. Hyunwoo was shattered.

In the next few days, Hyunwoo had taken time off from everything, to plan and prepare himself for a funeral and rather than make a scene with Kihyun's parents, he lets them plan the whole thing, giving them all his possessions, like things he wore every day of his life, which he informed them of.

At the funeral, all the boys were with the family, as they were his second family. A lot of their classmates came and gave their condolences. All the boys sat, and waited, as they were the six pallbearers. The service had them with tears in their eyes, and they did their final look, Hyunwoo being the most affected. Minhyuk pulling a strong second. All the others though seemed like they were deeply depressed. All in black, as well as a touch of dark blue, not navy, but close.

The six boys did what had been asked as the family watched, all tears and sobs. All the boys, their heads down, carried the casket to the hearse. All the boys got in Hyunwoo's car, driving over to the grave site. He hadn't really wanted to be near the site, but he did what was best.

He sat down with the others as they watched Kihyun's casket enter the ground. It was a sad moment, once the casket was in the ground far enough, the funeral director actually asked family and close friends, which caused the boy's parents to rise, to drop a white rose over the casket, and Hyunwoo was handed a maroon red rose to place on top all the white, as well as a handful of dirt.

He watched as the rest of the dirt was piled on, and he sadly looked away to not see the looks of pity from Kihyun's older brother. The guy had tormented his younger brother all his life for him only to never be told the forgiveness he had wanted.

Hoseok and Hyungwon wandered over to Hyunwoo's side, Hoseok putting his arm around the other man's shoulder, “ Hyung, he's in a better place, “ He whispered, not wanting to cry anymore, or for his hoarse voice to be noticed.

Hyunwoo nodded and watched on, his eyes with tears still present, he just kept to himself the last few days, to avoid talking and seeing things that reminded him of Kihyun. It was a trigger to see or hear about him.

Minhyuk was the most distraught, not including Hyunwoo, of the boys as he blamed himself, and he hadn't been able to sleep, it was noticeable to all the others, but they let him be. He hadn't left his house ever since the incident. He had become quiet and really reserved. No one blamed him, but he felt like everyone had. He felt a sting on his wrist, so he held it, and hide it to his chest.

Jooheon noticed the action, but he didn't say anything, he kept quiet, and Changkyun also saw the motion. He wondered if the action was from what he thought it was.

All the boys, Minhyuk excluded, decided, to go out and have a moment with each other. Jooheon though somehow convinced Minhyuk to come along to the restaurant. A long trip for the boys as they haven’t been to a good food place in ages together.

As the boys arrived to eat, Minhyuk sat quietly and ordered quietly, the others, telling some sweet and fond memories of Kihyun. Hyunwoo listened, but he stayed silent, hearing what the boys had to say about Kihyun. Minhyuk listened as well, not really paying attention as it all happened.

The food arrived and he reached for something across the table, his wrist becoming visible to everyone. Red stained gauze around his wrist and Jooheon was the first to react, pulling his hand closer for an inspection, which caused the other to quickly pull away, and excuse himself.

He took a running start at the door, but Hyunwoo quickly grabbed him and looked him in the eyes. Minhyuk stood frozen by the look. It wasn’t often Hyunwoo showed so much emotion, and it scared Minhyuk.

“ Are you self-harming Minhyuk? “ He asks quietly, silently hoping he was wrong. Minhyuk didn’t even look at him as he nodded his head slowly.

Hyunwoo gently takes his wrists, both of them, and looks at the bandages, “ Why are you Minhyuk? “ He asks, yet another obvious question. To which he gets no reply. Minhyuk just stands and says nothing, looking at his worn black dress shoes.

“ Hyunwoo, I can’t help but feel like I caused so much trouble. No matter what I say or do, I always do wrong, “ He whispers, still looking down at his shoes.

Hyunwoo looks at him and pulls him into his arms, hugging him close, “ Minhyuk, please don’t do this to yourself, “ He says, squeezing the poor boy.

Minhyuk clings onto Hyunwoo, feeling even worse that he made his friend feel worse. It wasn’t like he wanted to be so much of a depressed person, but the pain he felt was not really reversible. He wanted a numbing agent.

Hyunwoo looks at Minhyuk, who glances up at him. “ Promise me Minhyuk, “ He whispers.

Minhyuk just looks at him, eyes wide and fearful of what he was going to say, “ I can’t do that, Hyunwoo, but I’ll try, “ He mumbles.

Hyunwoo nods, “ Try to not do it anymore, please“ He pleads, looking him in the eyes, hoping the message he wanted had been caught.

The other boy looks at his older friend with a nod, trying to not cry at what he was feeling.

It was all quiet as the two made their way back to the seats they left, Jooheon looking down at his lap, Hoseok and Hyungwon watching as they came back, Changkyun watched Jooheon, trying to ask if he was alright.

“ Minhyuk, did you really feel that terrible? Not calling one us to talk about things, you know we’re always here for you right? We wouldn’t just abandon you like that. Is that what you think? “ Jooheon asks, standing up and walking over to look him in the face.

Minhyuk looks at him sadly and then down, continuing to be silent towards him. It wasn’t common for Minhyuk to be quiet, Jooheon had expected an answer. Not silence. It was a painful one at that. All the boys were waiting to hear a response from him.

“ Jooheon, stop. Don’t cause a scene like me please, “ Hyunwoo intervenes, setting the poor boy beside him.

Jooheon sat back down in his seat, a thought crossing his mind, ' Sad but Beautiful youth '. Changkyun glares at Minhyuk and then turns to eat his food as they all start to eat. Minhyuk plays with his food more than eating it, but he still eats a bite here and there.

After all the boys ate, they got up, all paying for their food as they left. Minhyuk was driven home, and all he could do was stare out the window. Hyunwoo worried about him, watching the road and taking glances at Minhyuk now and then.

Minhyuk sees his house come into the distance as Hyunwoo drives. As the car comes to a stop, he hops out, thanking Hyunwoo, waving at him as he left before he went in.

When he walked in, his parents were talking, he hears them discuss a method of treatment for their son.

He walks into his room quietly, as not to disturb his parents. He lays in his bed, a pain spreading across his body, starting at his hands, they tingle with the want to cut his arms again, but he promised he would try not to.

He curled up on his left side, away from facing the door. He hears it creak and looks at who entered, shock on his face.

It was Kihyun, the man that was buried earlier, his eyes had to be playing tricks as he saw him, he rubbed his eyes and looked up again only for him to be gone.

He closed his eyes tightly, trying to forget about what he saw. It didn't take long for him to pass out, he slept curled up, his mother checking to see if had come in yet. He had, and she smiled a little, she walked over and kissed his head, he was still her baby, and she knew he hurt.

Minhyuk dreamt that night. He dreamt of a dark wooded area. It was so dark, he could barely see his hand in front of his face. He looked around to find anything familiar. But nothing came to him.

That was until he looked up to a tree, Kihyun was sitting down in front of it, a smile on his face as he watched Minhyuk started to run at him. Though Minhyuk never got closer, he saw the smile on his friend's face.

It wasn't going away the smile, no it goes bigger and Kihyun seemed so happy, “ Minhyuk! Hurry! The others are waiting! “ He heard. His legs trying to carry farther. Kihyun waved his hands at him.

It hit him that he was getting further away, every step he took. He watched the man fade away, the smile never leaving his face as that happened.

“ Kihyun! Kihyun! NO! Kihyun! Don't leave me! Please! Come back! “ He screams, his body starting to ache as he ran, until he started to feel weak, something pulling him down as he went on.

Kihyun extended his hand out, his smile still never fading, “ Minhyuk, hurry we're gonna be late, “ He calls out, a chilling tone with his voice.

Minhyuk watched as he collapsed. He saw Kihyun's hand disappear from in front of him, his head spinning as he watched his friend vanish right before his eyes.

Minhyuk jumps awake, his mother and father both come running as they hear him scream out. It was still quite late when he woke up, but his mother came and sat next to him petting his hair as he cried his frustration out.

“ Mom, it's all my fault, I killed him, “ He says, tears streaking down his face as he looked up his mother, her soft brown eyes well with tears as she sees he baby crying.

His father watches as his son cries, he can't stand the sight, it hurt him so much to watch his son be in agony like this.

~ Time Skip 4-5 months after the funeral ~ ( Funeral and death in June or July )

All the boys were in Hyunwoo's apartment, or outside of it, all sitting, looking around or at their feet.

The first one to speak was Minhyuk, they hadn't all met since the night of the funeral, “ I had a dream about Kihyun, “ He blurts out, he hadn't spoken since that day.

Hyunwoo looked at him, nodding, “ I did too, “ He says, his voice scruffy sounding.

“ I keep blaming myself for everything... But I believe he's still alive... At least that's what I keep telling myself, “ Minhyuk whispers, his heartbreaking as he says it out loud.

All of them look at him confused, Hyungwon stared, his eyes glancing over the older boy, who was still quite distraught about the accident.

It was put in terms of ' Starting a never-ending disagreement ', as Minhyuk would say, his hurt heart being torn by the others.

The others started to get angry at him, yelling screaming cruel, mean words at the young man as he looked away, Hyunwoo and Jooheon the only ones keeping quiet. Though Hyunwoo stood, he walks right up to him and punched him in the face, busting his lower lip.

Minhyuk took off, going to a hiding spot, his heart sinking as he thought of the last time he was there, it was when he had failed one of his midterm tests, hurting because of the grade he had dropped a complete letter grade, he looks up and whispers to himself, “ They told me to stop hallucinating, but I believe... you're still with us... “ He felt an arm wrapped around him, he looked around seeing no one close.

Back with the boys, they all seemed to still be arguing about the topic Minhyuk had brought up, all of them were yelling, voices being loud as one yelled loud enough to be heard above all, it being Hoseok, “ I'm leaving, “ To which he actually ran away, Hyungwon watching his boyfriend get upset and run after him.

Behind him though was Jooheon and Changkyun, “ We're leaving, “ Changkyun had said, his voice soft as Hyunwoo watched.

Hyunwoo looked around, feeling something of a presence with him. He looked around but still sees he's alone.

Hyungwon stands in the wooded area, unfazed by the darkness, as he searched high and low for Hoseok. Hyungwon feels a chill and turns quickly, looking around for anything that was out there. Finding something laying on the brush covered forest ground.

Minhyuk hears Hoseok scream, he wonders for a split second, “ They must have forgotten you. They left you alone... But I will never forget, “ He whispers, looking up, wondering if it were true, adding to it, “ There ain't no way to forget you. “

~ Time Skip to the present ~

Hyungwon was in the bedroom of the apartment he and Hoseok shared, looking up from his spot on their bed, Hoseok laid next to him, arms around each other, “ Let's revive the Clan. “

Hoseok looks at him, surprised by his words, when Hyungwon adds, “ For the X Clan... For the seven us. “  
Hoseok though after hearing that nods, “ We should after that fight we had, none of us have really spoken have we? “  
~  
After a long and excruciating day at work, Jooheon sits down, Changkyun next him on the couch they had bought for their studio, the two boys looking at their phones, when a message popped up, from an all too familiar number.

Hyungwon.

The message read, ' Guys, it has been a while and I know we aren't on the best of terms since the argument, but I feel like part of m life is missing without you guys there, can we meet where we used to, by the base of the mountain, near where Hyunwoo lived. If you want you meet me there, let me know. I'll plan a weekend trip with the others to have a trip, for old times sake. '

Jooheon read it, and read it again , his eyes wondered the screen for a second, “ Maybe we should, “ He mumbles.

Changkyun nods a little, looking at the text, “ We could try, “ He whispers, looking away from his phone.

~  
Hyunwoo received a text while at work, his eyes glued to the computer in front of him, his eyes scanning the screen to check for any errors that could be there. He heard his phone ding, signifying a message was sent to him.

He looks at it for a moment, noticing the words not the sender, ' Hyunwoo, was wondering you would want to get the gang back together again, for old times sake. I miss seeing everyone and watching us have fun together like back when we were college kids. I really hope you do miss it as well. If you do call me and we can all work a time and date to meet. '

Hoseok.

He looks down and then shrugs, “ It'd be nice to see them all again, I guess, “ He says, looking at the text again before setting his phone down.

~  
Minhyuk had been in a therapy session when he received the text. His phone was on a loud setting in case of his mother or father, he had just been discussing if he should do his enlistment this coming year, or the next.

His text read with words that gave a panic attack, ' Minhyuk, I know you won't respond since you may have my number blocked, but I was hoping that since we broke apart you had that dream more, because I kept dreaming as well. Kihyun hasn't left my mind, I found my memories unforgiving to what happened that day. I know you may hate us all, but for the sake and sanity that we have, I think we should come back together. Would you consider letting all the things that happen help us get closer after the long year we all had since the funeral? If you want to meet call me and we can work out a time we can all meet. I promise there are no hard feelings from me or Hoseok, and Hyunwoo was never the type. '

Minhyuk read the text to his therapist, who wholeheartedly agreed, said he should go for the fact of his issues and that it was better to solve them at the root of it than to just fix it where it was.

He nodded and checked his watch leaving from his appointment a little later than usual.  
~  
All of them had finally gotten back to Hyungwon and Hoseok, planning it for November 14, the very next month.

Hoseok and Hyungwon discuss plans they want to happen on the planned date, the two agree on meeting for lunch and then for another part afterwards. It wasn't planned completely planned out, but they would have it in the next two-three days.

~  
Minhyuk had barely been able to think when he told them a date he was free, his head was on other things at that moment, but he did tell them a good day. He could have just lied and told them he was busy but he never was and everyone knew that about him. He didn't do much and that was the hard thing to understand.

He was sitting with a book out, his eyes roaming the pages fast. His therapist always giving him recommendations, so he didn't feel as bad for not going out like a normal person of his age, as he worked from his home, and never left unless he had to shop, and even then that wasn't often he kept in on schedule.

All in all, it felt like the wrong decision for him to make.

~  
Hyunwoo gets a call after texting them about meeting, and the call extends for a while he finds a weekend off and how everything had been going all three of their lives, Hyunwoo getting promoted, Hyungwon finally having his career take off, Hoseok finally figuring out if his modeling career would even start. Just the basics for them.

It was an interesting chat none the less, and they all were happy with the agreement.

~  
Jooheon and Changkyun were much easier than Minhyuk, but harder than Hyunwoo. Their schedules were always a mess and it took forever to finally work with them on the date. The two had always had issues with this before, and it showed in their work, as it was so well put together and always produced fast, not really taking a break did that to them.

Even though it was difficult, the two had finally though been able to work it all out, discussing more about what had happened, informing them if they're finally pronounced relationship. Jooheon being a little shy about it, while Changkyun was blunt and up front with it.

All seemed good. So far.

~

When it came time to meet though, it was a difficult task in the end to finally meet, Minhyuk was early, waiting by himself in the park as told by Hyungwon a week earlier. He sat on a swing, it was one the few places he could sit without issues.

He saw a familiar figure walk in his directions, another chasing after the taller of the two. He watches them, he sighs once he notices it is two of his former friends.

Jooheon and Changkyun were walking together when Changkyun decided he was walking a head of Jooheon. He walks straight into the park where Hyungwon and Hoseok had directed them, seeing the all to familiar form of their hyung Minhyuk, who they hadn't spoke to in over a year.

Minhyuk looks down when he hears the two maknaes walk closer to him. The two were talking loudly about something that was usually not discussed outside of the studio. Minhyuk hears the discussion and turns his head, swinging again like he would.

The two watch him as he ignores them, both confused and worried, “ Hyung? “ Jooheon calls to him, a tone of sadness in his voice. Everyone worried for him as he was the one that had a traumatic experience. Jooheon and Changkyun watch him as they continue to talk, but this time a little less loudly and less excited.

Minhyuk looks up at him a small smile plastered to his face, “ Yes Heonnie? “ He asks.

Jooheon smiles at him and sees the look in his eyes, it was sadness and it was a large part of his eyes, “ Are you alright? “ He asked.

Minhyuk nodded, his legs kicking as he swung in the air. Jooheon's was drawn away from Minhyuk in a moment by Changkyun talking to him again.

Off in a distance was a familiar figure again, it actually catching Minhyuk's attention, and kept it. He hadn't seen that man in a full year and it still felt fresh in his mind. The night of the argument was the worst memory he had to date and he was hoping he had forgotten.

Hyunwoo walked into the park, seeing the other three, his eyes fixated on Minhyuk, his pace quickens as he walks closer, hearing the other two shout and wave at him. It had been a year after all for everyone. No one had seen them together and it was a shock to most the place.

As Hyunwoo walks closer and sits on a bench, the other two following. While this was occurring, Hyungwon and Hoseok walk into the park, a few fingers tangled together. The two quietly chatting about something.

As they get closer. Hyunwoo goes and speaks with Minhyuk as best as possible with the boy in his current state of depression and anxiety. He was a bit harder to speak to apparently, as no one had struck up a conversation with him.

Hyungwon and Hoseok though were watching as they walked closer, and sitting down with each other, as well as the other two who were still talking about some songs.

It was a big shock for Minhyuk, “ Minhyuk, are you alright? “ Hyunwoo asked, his eyes lingering on his wrists for a moment.

Minhyuk looked up at him for a moment, his voice not working the way he anted it too, “ Yes Hyunwoo, I am alright, seeing a therapist to control my anxiety, “ He says, hoping that he had made enough of an excuse.

Hyunwoo nods and smiles a little, “ Happy to hear that you're doing better, “ He quickly responds, making Minhyuk smile a little bit.

The two talked a little bit, Minhyuk getting up and walking with Hyunwoo to the others, seeing them having fun talking and apparently having much to discuss among themselves. It was a scene to be hold, almost like the group wasn't alone anymore.  
~  
All deciding it was time to eat they all had walked to restaurant, picking a simple BBQ place that was well known in their part of town. All seemed to be going to plan and had been easier then Hyungwon thought.

After that Hoseok and Hyungwon lead them to a place that was highly familiar as they have talked and discussed a lot during the dinner.

The old pool hall they had visited in their earlier years of friendship. It was the only place they could visit without being called hoodlums because the owner knew Hyunwoo's and Minhyuk's families. The owner had made sure they were good kids before letting them in his pool hall.

While they played games of pool and took turns of teaming up on each other, they watched a small TV put up and listened to the music it played, laughing and jokingly dancing to girl group songs, and some boy group songs.  
All was going well at the pool hall, but changed when Hoseok asked a question, “ Guys, I wonder, do you think we could visit the old park? The one we went to when we were just starting to become friends? “

Minhyuk jumped at the question, his eyes looking down cast. Hyunwoo looking away from Hoseok, as the other three nod and smile at him. The place mentioned was one of many memories and experiences, but it was also a ground for them to fight again.

All them though end up going, talking about the good times and learning of the new things they had done in recent months.

Minhyuk had only talked about what he could, seeing as he was still trying to get over things no matter how long ago it happened. Hyungwon and Hoseok told them about the planned wedding coming in the next year. Jooheon and Changkyun explained about their producing jobs, letting them all know about how the work had began and what they achieved so far in the industry. Hyunwoo told how he was working as a desk worker on the weekdays and on the weekends working as part-time dance teacher.

In all those moments, Hyungwon saw a light flash in front of his eyes. He stood. Excusing himself to go pee in the woods, like they did a year ago. Instead of using the bathroom, he followed the flashing that was calling him. He picked it up and it flashed a memory of Kihyun and him walking the path to get a bit peace away from the others, talking about the feelings he had back then when he had no courage to talk to Hoseok. Kihyun encouraging him to open up about it and explain to Hoseok how he felt with so much happiness to help his doesang.

Hoseok soon followed after him, catching a light of his own. He picked it up and watched the memory flash before his eyes. It was of him and Kihyun cooking together. Hoseok had asked how he cooked his ramen since he couldn't cook it right no matter the method. Kihyun had take pity and helped him cook noodles like he did and Hoseok was forever excited every time he cooked. Kihyun had helped him in more way then one that day. Helping also learn to in general cook better.

Minhyuk got worried about the two, until he saw a light glare into his eyes and he looked to where it was coming from. He saw a light stick, picking up along the way. Memories flashing on front of him. The one in particular standing out was one of him and Kihyun playing pool, alone for the day, talking about something that Minhyuk rarely spoke about, his love life. He was telling Kihyun about who he liked, Jooheon and Changkyun both, but he was confused by it. Kihyun though had made his feel ten times better about explaining that some people just love more than one person.

Jooheon gets scared and follows the path Minhyuk took. He never sees Minhyuk but he does see a light glow on the distance. It seemed weak but it grew brighter as he got closer. Jooheon grabs the light source, holding it in his hand, looking at it closely. A surge of memories he had kept pressed into his mind came forward as he stared at it. Keeping him grounded was the memory he had when he meet Kihyun, the man had freshly done pink hair and was sweet as can be. The older picking him up and making sure he was safe and sound. Even though it was Hyunwoo who had knocked him down, Kihyun had worried about him.

Changkyun sighs, and walks to Hyunwoo, “ Hyung, we have to go look for them, their not coming back it seems, “ He says with a serious tone as he could have.

Hyunwoo nods, and looks around to get a grasp of where they were, “ I'll go this way and you go another alright? “ He asks, looking around once again.

“ Of course hyung, “ He responds, walking in a direction, trying to follow after Jooheon.

Hyunwoo walks his long path and sees a lights bloom in his path, he follows the trail until its almost blinding, grabbing the one he saw shine brightest. Once the light is in his hand, the man sees before him a memory of the day he confessed to Kihyun, long after their friendship started. Kihyun had just broken up with his second boyfriend and was crying to Hyunwoo about it. In their long time together, Kihyun had explained a lot to him an it made clear sense as to why they were friends for that long. Kihyun had feared a relationship that could possible go bad and lose one the best friends he had in young life. So the two were eating at Hyunwoo's one night and Hyunwoo confessed sitting on the couch across from the fire place and TV mount.

Changkyun though had a difficult time seeing the lights, his eyes were squinting when he saw it, he couldn't help but see it. His hand reached for whatever light was causing him this trouble, latching on to the light, and staring at it with a small smile. His memory was the day Kihyun helped him over come his fear of talking to in large crowds, which was a rather big thing in his life. The two walked, talking normally until Kihyun had turned to face him and smiled widely telling him to rap for a crowd of people. He almost couldn't do it. He was so terrified of the crowd. The younger was always scared of it, until Kihyun had uttered the words he needed, “ You can do it, trust me, I believe in you Changkyun, don't make me change that. “

After that, sequence of memories passed through each man, making them look around and see the others. All congregating toward a section of the lights, Hyunwoo having larger section. All of them though watched each memory as it passed, some making them cry, and others making them laugh. Among them though were memories that Kihyun had cherished, ones that could never be replaced. They all meet in the center after a final memory.

Minhyuk glanced around, his final memory bringing tears to his eyes, it was the memory of Kihyun finding out about his cutting issue. Kihyun had soothed the boy, having him explain why he was doing it, and it all made sense, Minhyuk was bullied for his loud and sweet nature. Kihyun had cared enough to tend to the wounds and made she sure they were not infected already. Giving the boy his space when he needed it. Kihyun had made things easier for him, helping him stop almost completely. Until the very end.

In the final moments, Minhyuk touched his arms and wrists gently, looked out at the field that he and the others stood in, it wasn't like he hated it, it just brought back all the memories of a shared bond he had with Kihyun. Memories he sometimes wished had never ended, “We missed out on each other, to search for the X Clan....“ He whispers, hoping it made sense. As he heard it, he seemed to like it made plenty of sense, he adds quietly to himself, “ At the last of the disagreement, we stepped on a lonely road... “

Hyunwoo looks around, all the lights flickering and flashing brightly. All of his memories with Kihyun's. All the things they did, the first time they met, the first of everything between them, he then remembers the oath, “We, betting on everything we have, solemnly swear, that we will abide by everything said in this oath. 1 Find what we have lost, 1 Fill up our empty heart, 1 Find the right path and move on forwards, 1 We will not leave anyone behind. We will become one and protect the X Clan.”

Jooheon looks around, he smiles a little, hoping Kihyun was finally free of his sadness, he felt something move behind him, he looked and saw nothing, wondering if that was what he thought it was.

Changkyun looks around, his heart hurt, and looks to Hyunwoo, he hugs him and hides his face from the lights, remembering all the things he had done with Kihyun, and then with all the others.

Hyungwon and Hoseok look and watch on, “ I feel better about being a group again, rather than hating each other. It was a smart move Hyungwon to get everyone together again, “ Hoseok says, wrapping his arm around the other. Hyungwon nods along with what Hoseok has said.

“ It wasn’t a smart move, it was the right move, we needed this kind of closure, Kihyun wouldn’t want us at each other's throats like were before, “ Hyungwon says, still clinging onto Hoseok, as he smiles at the looks on everyone’s faces. It was a shock to see everyone with such happiness after the long drawn out time they had apart from each other.

Peace was the look on everyone’s face as they looked out at the lights. All flickering in a pattern, which drew them all to the center of the field.

Once in the center, the boys look at each other, Minhyuk looked at them all, “ I’m sorry Jooheon, Changkyun. I should have been a better friend all those years ago, “ He said, holding his arms open, walking closer to Jooheon and Changkyun.

The two look at him, both smiling slightly at how he was acting, almost like he had when they were together in the past.

The others watch on, feeling the urge to join in on the hug, which they did, “ I bet Kihyun is finally resting better than before. Guys, I love you all so much, I’m sorry that I couldn’t find the confidence to talk to you guys after that night, “ Minhyuk says, eyes watering as he spoke, the words were honest and that was something they hadn’t been in a very long time, especially coming from Minhyuk.

At the last moment, they all looked around, together, watching as a group what happened, “ We met once again, “ Minhyuk whispered, everyone, looking at him, waiting to see what else he had to say.

“ Even though we gambled everything away... We still have to guard the X Clan, “ He adds, making it final. Hyunwoo was surprised he heard part of the oath leave his mouth. Words that they hadn't heard in over a year since what had happened.

All the boys look at each other, and then in the center of the circle, seeing a very familiar figure standing there, with a blocked out vision, a smile on his face as he turns to feel everyone's presence around him.

All of them say together, unplanned, “ Kihyun. “

He waves gently and pulls the blindfold that was covering his eyes, quietly saying, “ Thank you guys, so much for helping me rest easy, Minhyuk I never blamed you, Hyunwoo I never stopped loving you, I wish my babies would grow up, thank you Hyungwon, Hoseok, for being the ones who brought us back together, “ and with that he opens his eyes for one final time, the whole area flashing bright white light around them, almost as if lightning flashed.

No one had seen the pale blue eyes that Kihyun had as he finally vanished, leaving them with the final words they had needed to hear. All of them looking at the spot Kihyun had been in moments ago, all them had tears in their eyes.

All together again, never failing to comeback together, even after a disaster.


End file.
